Darkness Into Light 5/6
Terry L Odell (tlco777@JUNO.COM)
Fri, 31 Aug 2001 13:22:43 -0400
Darkness Into Light
T. L. Odell
Part 5/6
See Part 0 for Disclaimers
"Richie, this is Cecile. She's one of Tessa's school friends from
France. She lives in Chicago now, but she flew in for the weekend
to visit with Tessa."
"Hello, Richie. Good to meet you."
Richie took in her mild accent, less pronounced than Tessa's.
Cecile wore her chestnut hair pulled back at the nape of her neck.
Her bright smile brought a welcome change from the strained
expressions Duncan had been wearing. "It's good of you to come
all this way. I'm sure Tessa appreciates it."
Duncan excused himself and went to the shop. Richie turned his
attention back to Cecile. "I was just going to order some dinner.
What would you like? Italian or Chinese?"
"How about if I cook, Richie? I'm sure you could use a home
cooked meal. I was a Cordon Bleu student once."
"I don't think we have any chicken. Or cheese, either. We haven't
exactly been into the domestic scene lately."
Cecile laughed. "The Cordon Bleu is a cooking school as well as a
chicken dish. How about if we go shopping and then I'll cook?
You pick the menu - chicken, fish, steak, whatever. My treat.
Tessa's men deserve it."
Richie jumped at the chance to have someone with him. He was
still terrified of encountering another Immortal when he was alone.
"Sounds wonderful. I'll get my jacket."
"I'll tell Duncan where we're going," Cecile said.
They pushed their cart up and down the grocery store aisles,
planning the menu. "Will you and Duncan eat salmon? You get
such good seafood here in Seacouver."
"Sure. Sounds good."
Cecile insisted that the fish monger let her smell the salmon before
she would accept it. "And please, take the skin off." She spoke to
the grocer at the produce department. "These peppers are old.
And the lettuce is wilted. Don't you have anything fresher?" She
called the manager when she found a carton of cream that had
passed its expiration date on the shelf. "Americans let themselves
be pushed around. If you're paying these prices, you should insist
on top quality."
While they stood in line at the check-out counter, Cecile turned the
conversation to Tessa. "Richie, how's Tessa doing? She was
sedated and asleep by the time I got to the hospital. She doesn't
look very good. And Duncan looks like he hasn't slept in weeks."
"Tessa's getting better. She really is. She had some complications,
but it's just going to take a while. I think they're keeping her pretty
drugged to make sure everything heals properly, and she doesn't
get any more blood clots. Duncan's probably knows more of the
medical stuff. I know she'll be glad to see you. She's usually
better in the mornings."
"Duncan seems to resent that I'm here. Do you know why that
might be?" she asked.
"Mac's not himself. He was pretty much a zombie until Tessa got
out of the ICU. I think he thinks he has to be by her side every
minute or she won't get well. I have this feeling that he uses a
stopwatch on any of Tessa's friends who come to visit. I've been
minding the shop so he can be there, staying out of his way."
"Well, he'll have to share her a little for a couple of days. I can be
pretty selfish, too."
"I'd like to see him try to kick you out of her room," he mumbled.
Over dinner, Cecile told both Immortals about her adventures with
Tessa in school. Duncan seemed to be listening with rapt
attention. Richie wished he'd pay half as much attention to him.
But of course. Cecile was talking about Tessa.
Duncan drove Cecile to the airport on Sunday night. When he
came back to the apartment, Richie tried to fill him in on what had
been happening in the shop, but the vacant expression on the
Highlander's face made Richie wonder if he had heard anything
he'd said.
Look at me! he wanted to cry. Help me deal with this. Tessa's
getting better. I'm still lost.
Instead, he cleaned the kitchen, watched some television, and shut
himself in his bedroom, the gun under his pillow. He started
making plans to leave once Tessa was well enough and Duncan
could look after the shop again. Richie didn't think he would be
able to bear their resentment over his being Immortal. It should
have been Tessa. She's the one who should spend the rest of
eternity with Duncan, not just a few more decades. Duncan would
probably help find him a teacher. If not, he could go to Paris and
hide with Darius until he found one himself.
The phone rang the next evening. "Hello," Richie said.
"Hi. It's Tessa."
"Tessa? What's wrong?"
"Nothing; I'm feeling better. Duncan just left. I thought I'd catch
you home. I've missed you. Friends have dropped by. I haven't
seen you."
Tessa sounded winded. Richie said, "Take it easy, Tessa."
"Sounds worse that it is. Still have trouble getting my breath."
"I've been working in the shop."
"So Duncan says. I told him to stay home tomorrow morning.
You could visit me. I just wanted to be sure you got the message."
She stopped to catch her breath. "In case he forgets to tell you. I
really want to talk to you."
Richie battled the sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. She's
going to tell me it's time for me to move on. He forced himself to
sound cheerful. "I'll be there Tessa. First thing tomorrow."
Richie felt Duncan watching him that evening, but the Highlander
was clearly reluctant to bring up Tessa's suggestion. Richie didn't
feel like helping him broach the topic. After dinner, he flopped
down on the couch and started thumbing the remote through the
television channels. Duncan settled on the armchair and waited
over an hour before breaking his silence.
"Richie. How about if I take a turn in the shop tomorrow
morning? You can go visit Tessa."
Richie kept his eyes on the television. "That's okay, Mac. You
can go. I don't mind working in the shop."
"No, really. I think she should see you."
"Gee, Mac. Are you sure? I mean, I've kind of gotten into a nice
routine and all. Maybe Sunday would be better." Part of him
enjoyed watching Duncan try to be nonchalant. Another part
dreaded facing Tessa.
"Richie. You go to the hospital tomorrow."
"Are you ordering me to go?" Richie looked at Duncan. He saw
the look of frustration on the Highlander's face change to one of
understanding.
"She called you, didn't she?" asked Duncan. "You've been waiting
for me to say something."
"I knew you'd get around to it eventually. I'm sorry I teased you."
"No, I should have said something sooner. Did Tessa say what she
wanted?"
"No. Do you know?"
"She just said she missed you, and that I should give you a break
from the shop."
"Mac, I promise that I'll come back as soon as I can."
"I'll be fine. Stay as long as Tessa wants you there."
Richie agreed. That night, his sleep was filled with images of
Tessa screaming at him, swinging a sword, trying to take his head.
Or was it Duncan? He woke up to the sound of his own voice,
drenched in sweat. His heart pounded. He heard a soft tap on the
door. "Richie?" Are you awake?" Duncan called softly. Richie
strove to control his ragged breathing and feigned sleep. The door
remained closed, and he heard the sound of quiet footsteps walking
away.
Richie approached Tessa's hospital room the next morning, his jaw
clenched. This is where Tessa tells me it's time to go. Richie
braced himself and walked through the doorway. Tessa sat
propped up in bed, her blonde hair falling loosely around her face.
Richie noted her ashen color, the dark shadows heavy under her
eyes. She looked so tiny and frail. But she smiled and seemed
cheerful. "You look good, Tessa."
"I look half dead. But I feel more than half alive. That's a good
start. I've missed you. Mac says you've been very busy in the
shop."
She sounded a little better than she had on the phone, but talking
was still an effort. "Yeah, well it didn't seem right to keep it closed
after all the announcements that it was going to re-open. As it is,
we're operating on shortened hours," he said.
"Sit." She moved over and patted the bed beside her.
Richie reluctantly did as she asked. He didn't think he could stand
it when she asked him to leave, not being this close. "Look,
Tessa," he blurted out. "I've been thinking. You probably don't
want me around, especially since I'm Immortal now, and I could
find another place to live. I can still help in the shop until you find
someone else, or until you're back on your feet again."
"What are you talking about?"
"How can you look at me? I mean, you got shot because I
wouldn't listen to Mac, and you almost died, and now I'm Immortal
and you're not and-"
"Quiet," Tessa interrupted. She took several deep breaths. "I had a
long talk with Duncan yesterday. He blames himself, not you. He
thinks if he hadn't gone back into the house, nothing would have
happened. We can't know that. That kid could have shot me no
matter who was standing beside me."
She stopped and pointed to the water glass at her bedside. Richie
held it for her as she sipped through the straw. He poured himself
a glass from the pitcher on the table. Tessa's eyes flew open wide
and she grabbed his hand. "No."
"Tess! What's wrong?"
"They measure every drop I drink ... has to match up with what
comes out."
Richie felt himself blushing; he carefully poured the water back
into the pitcher.
"What Mac did was inexcusable," Tessa went on. "But I hope you
might be able to understand and forgive him."
"Forgive him? For what? I don't know what you mean."
"He told me that he's always known you would be Immortal. Why
he chose to keep it from us is his business. He was hoping you
would be older before you died ... that you would have been
stronger ... have learned more about life. I think he secretly hoped
you'd just live a normal life. I know he wanted to be there for you.
If it had been under any other circumstances-"
"Tessa, I can't blame him for leaving me. You were the one who
needed the attention. He had to help you."
"You're saying that now, Richie. But he left you alone in the
bushes. You must have felt abandoned. Anyone would."
"Tessa, ever since I woke up, I wondered if he'd known. It was
great of you two to take me in after I tried to rob his store, but I
always thought there might be some other reason. It makes a lot
more sense now."
"And then, he spent all his time at the hospital. He ignored you,
didn't he?"
"But, Tess ... he was afraid you would die. And I was alive. I can
understand that he didn't want anything to do with me."
"Understanding doesn't always make the pain go away, though,
does it?" Tessa touched Richie's hand.
"I guess not."
"Richie, I've always known I was mortal. Duncan told me that
long ago, when he showed me he was Immortal. He knew and I
knew. I think it was because I didn't die that he fell apart the way
he did."
"Tessa, you're way out of my league here. Are you saying Duncan
wished you'd died? No way."
"No, I'm saying that if I'd died, it would have been over. A clean
cut. Painful, yes. He would have grieved, but he understands
grief. He's seen so many loved ones die." She took Richie's hands
in hers. "What he can't deal with is being helpless. I was lying
there, and there was absolutely nothing he could do except be
there. So he was there. All the time." Her steadfast gaze met his.
"Do you understand?"
Richie nodded. "I think so."
"Duncan feels terrible about what he did to you. Right now, he's
too embarrassed about the way he's behaved to talk to you.
Sometimes, the longer you wait, the harder something gets. He
knows he deserted you. He's really grateful to you for the way you
stuck by him."
"How can you know that? He hasn't said a word to me, except to
talk about you."
"I've been lying here with my eyes closed most of the time for over
a week. But I haven't been asleep all that time. Duncan probably
doesn't know how much I really heard. Sometimes he'd fall asleep
in the chair. I'd see him having nightmares, calling your name. He
loves you, Richie."
Richie believed her. He remembered how easy it had been to
reveal his fears to her as she lay in her bed. He wondered how
much of his own outpourings she had heard.
"Duncan will apologize to you," she continued. It may take him a
while to come to his senses and figure out what he did and why he
did it, but he will apologize. I promise you that. He may be a
stubborn Scot, but he's a kind, loving stubborn Scot." She reached
up and tousled Richie's hair. "I love you, Richie. You're family.
If you promise to be careful, I could use a hug."
"So could I." He leaned forward and put his arm around her
shoulder. She felt so fragile. She caressed him; he buried his face
in her neck and let the tears flow. "I love you, too."
He pulled away, wiping his eyes. "I'm sorry."
"What for?"
"For crying like that."
Tessa took his hands in hers. "Maybe when you were a child, you
were told you weren't supposed to cry. Well, whoever told you
that was wrong. You have nothing to be sorry about. You can
come here and cry with me any time you need to." She gave
Richie an impish grin. "And I won't tell a soul."
Richie almost laughed. He spent much of the day with Tessa,
talking, watching television, watching her sleep, dozing in the
chair by her bed. The knot in the pit of his stomach loosened. He
fed her what the nurse called lunch. She sent him down to the
cafeteria to get his own lunch, but wouldn't let him go home.
"Duncan can fend for himself. It'll be good for him. Give him
time to think."
As the afternoon wore on, Richie asked Tessa why Duncan hadn't
called.
"I told him if he bothered me while we were having our time
together, I wouldn't let him come back tomorrow either," she
explained.
"You are one mean lady." Richie grinned, then looked at her more
closely. "You are also one tired lady. Why don't you get some
sleep? I'll go back and relieve Duncan."
"You're probably right. You tell Duncan that I'm fine, and that I
just want to sleep. Besides, by the time he'd get here, it would be
almost time to go home."
"I'll tell him, but I'll bet you a half gallon of double chocolate
fudge ice cream that he comes anyway, even for five minutes."
"I'm not going to take that bet. Come give me a kiss."
End of Part 5