6. Highlander: The Series Drinking Games

6.1. First Season - Mark V - July 29, 1993

by Lady Johanna Constantine

This game was born one evening over Spring break when the author was showing her friend all the episodes she had on tape. They were viewed consecutively over a 9 hour period, very late at night, in Carbondale, Illinois. Oddly enough, no alcohol was involved, and the author is ashamed to admit she came up with mark I completely sober.

Additions and corrections from all the fine folks on USENET, a few from "The Raven" (a Forever Knight letterzine), and a woman in Cleveland who shall be known only as Maddog.

Units of measurement

One Drink = one swallow or sip. Or, if you are feeling really daring, m&m's or Reeses peanut butter cups can be substituted for beverages, if you prefer to be able to walk the following morning.

Vocabulary notes

immie = USENET slang for a Highlander-style immortal

Seacouver = Seattle/Vancouver, i.e. the "Generic American City" Highlander takes place in 2/3rds of the time

*the* leather jacket = That black, dimensionally transcendental leather jacket that Duncan hides 3 feet of steel yet is still able to do jumps, kicks, and rolls without any sign of the damn thing.

dimensionally transcendental = does the word TARDIS mean anything to you? ie, bigger on the inside than on the outside.

Masamune = The Japanese guy mentioned from the movie who made Ramirez's sword, not to be confused with Masamune Shirow (no Appleseed here, folks)

WARNING: this game has apparently caused people to burst into audible laughter. If you are in a public place, proceed with caution. You have been warned.

• Someone who is supposedly American sounds suspiciously Canadian for some reason - One drink
• Someone who is watching the episode with you suddenly remarks "Hey, that looks like Vancouver." - One drink
• You point out the Washington State license plates to them in an attempt to assist the suspension of disbelief - Three drinks
• Duncan kisses Tessa - One drink
• Duncan tells Richie to stay, and Richie ignores him - One drink
• A rearranged "Who Wants to Live Forever?" is used for incidental music - One drink
• A Queen song is playing in background - One drink
• An immie says "Who wants to live forever?" - One drink
• A mortal says "Who wants to live forever?" - One drink
• Randi or the law enforcement officer of your choice says "What are you, MacLeod? FBI? CIA?" or any variation thereof - Two drinks
• Tessa works on a sculpture - Two drinks
• Tessa is threatened by an immie - One drink
• Tessa is threatened by a mortal - One drink
• A sword is drawn - One drink
• That sword is a katana/daito - One drink
• That sword is a Masamune katana/daito (other than Duncan's) - Two drinks
• Duncan meets an immie on holy ground - One drink
• Duncan meets with Darius - One drink
• Duncan wears *the* leather jacket - One drink
• Duncan is wearing *the* leather jacket and suddenly whips out his katana - Two drinks (where *does* he hide it?)
• Duncan wears any of his numerous trenchcoats - One drink
• Duncan says "I am Duncan MacLeod of the clan MacLeod." - Two drinks
• Duncan speaks with a Scots accent - One drink
• Duncan says "there can be only one" - Two drinks (Three drinks if he says it and then doesn't take their head)
• Any other immie says "there can be only one" - One drink
• Duncan wears his hair down - One drink
• Duncan wears his hair down in a sequence other than a flashback - Two drinks
• A flashback starts - One drink
• That flashback involves hair extensions of any kind - Two drinks
• A flashback ends - One drink
• You are in one of the cities that edits the episodes heavily and you hear the sound effect of a flashback starting, but then there is no flashback - Two drinks
• An immortal woman is introduced - One drink
• That immortal woman was one of Duncan's lovers - Two drinks
• That immortal woman introduced is one whom Duncan hasn't slept with - Four drinks (it's so rare)
• Duncan senses another immie (Quickening/spider sense) - Two drinks
• Duncan draws blood - One drink
• Duncan is wounded - One drink
• Duncan beheads another immie - Three drinks
• They actually show the headless corpse - Four drinks
• Duncan lets another immie live - Two drinks
• Duncan uses something other than a sword to parry (ie: wood, a pipe, a body part, etc.) - One drink
• Duncan uses a sword that is not his Masamune katana - Two drinks
• Duncan is witness to a crime - One drink
• A rock singer guest stars as an immie - Four drinks
• Duncan takes after someone at a sprint - One drink
• Duncan takes his shirt off - Four drinks
• One of LeBrun's officers speaks perfect, unaccented English - Three drinks
• One of LeBrun's officers' voices is looped in by someone who speaks perfect, unaccented English - One drink
• Someone in Paris starts a conversation in English for no apparent reason save that subtitles would cost too much, and might be distracting - Two drinks
• Duncan uses the phone *while* he is also using the modem - Three drinks
• There are more than two immies in the same episode - One drink (this includes Duncan and Darius)
• There are more than two immies in the same scene - Two drinks
• There are more than three immies in the same episode - Three drinks
• There is more than three immies in the same scene - Four drinks
• Richie refers to Duncan as "Mac" - One drink
• Tessa refers to Duncan as "Mac" - Two drinks (after the pilot, she almost never does this. Take care while watching "The Gathering", and do not operate heavy machinery afterwards. This may include your vcr)
• Richie tries to speak French - One drink for every word correct
• Question for the girls: You are watching the show with a guy who makes a lewd comment about Alexandra, and you are forced to hit him - One drink
• Question for the girls: You make a lewd comment about Adrian, and one of the guys reminds you he is married - One drink

6.2. Second Season - Mark I - June 13, 1994

By Tara O'Shea (Lady Johanna Constantine)

This game was born because so many people, after reading the first season game, desired an edition and hounded me until I wrote one. Actually, I got bored one night, and taking all those lovely people into consideration, decided it was time we had a second series game too.

Units of measurement

One Drink = one swallow or sip. Or, if you are feeling really daring, m&m's or Reeses peanut butter cups can be substituted for beverages, if you prefer to be able to walk the following morning.

Vocabulary notes

immie = USENET slang for a Highlander-style immortal

Seacouver = Seattle/Vancouver, i.e. the "Generic American City" Highlander takes place in 2/3rds of the time

WARNING: this game has apparently caused people to burst into audible laughter. If you are in a public place, proceed with caution. You have been warned.

• Someone who is supposedly American sounds suspiciously Canadian for some reason - One drink
• Someone who is watching the episode with you suddenly remarks "Hey, that looks like Vancouver." - One drink
• You point out the Washington State license plates to them in an attempt to assist the suspension of disbelief - Three drinks
• Duncan kisses Tessa - One drink
• Duncan kisses someone other than Tessa, in the present, who just happens to be blonde and spunky, and amazingly attracted to him - Two drinks
• Duncan kisses someone who looks just like Tessa, but isn't - Three drinks
• Tessa is threatened by an immie - One drink
• Tessa is threatened by a mortal - One drink
• Tessa dies - Okay, so it only happened once, but you'll need the liquor if you're as mushy as I am, and a good cry always helps.
• Duncan tells Richie to stay, and Richie ignores him - One drink
• Duncan tells Richie to go, and all the fans on Usenet freak out - Two drinks
• Duncan tells Richie to go, and all the fans who freaked are flamed by the ones who never got over the fact that Tessa died and need to strike out somehow - Three drinks (You'll need 'em as you try to reason with 'em)
• A rearranged "Who Wants to Live Forever?" is used for incidental music - One drink
• A rearranged "Who Wants to Live Forever?" should be used for incidental music - Two drinks
• They use "Dust in the Wind" instead - Three drinks
• They use "Dust in the Wind" instead and you end up bursting into tears - Forget the glass, go with the bottle and a box of Puffs and go marathon first season for a while.
• An immie says "Who wants to live forever?" - One drink
• A mortal says "Who wants to live forever?" - One drink
• A Watcher says "Who wants to live forever?" and smirks evilly - Run, it's Horton back from the dead again.
• Duncan says "I am Duncan MacLeod of the Clan MacLeod." - Two drinks
• Duncan speaks with a Scots accent - One drink
• Duncan says "there can be only one" - Two drinks (Two more drinks if he says it and then doesn't take their head)
• Any other immie says "there can be only one" - One drink
• Duncan wears his hair down - One drink
• Duncan wears his hair down in a sequence other than a flashback - Two drinks
• It's actually all Adrian's hair too - Two and a half drinks (you don't want to pass out and miss anything good, now do you? He might have his shirt off in the same episode, and you want to be consious for that, ladies...)
• A flashback starts - One drink
• That flashback involves hair extensions of any kind - Two drinks
• That flashback actually uses a wigh to simulate short hair now that Adrian's gone to all the trouble of growing it long - Three drinks
• A flashback ends - One drink
• An immortal women is introduced - One drink
• That immortal woman was one of Duncan's lovers - Two drinks
• That immortal woman introduced is one whom Duncan hasn't slept with - Four drinks (it's so rare)
• Duncan then sleeps with that immortal woman - One drink (don't tell me you're surprised?)
• Duncan sleeps with her because he was guilt-tripped/grief-tripped into it - Two drinks
• Duncan senses another immie (Buzz/spider sense) - Two drinks
• Duncan beheads another immie - Three drinks
• That immie just happens to be a dear old friend who Duncan was forced to kill because they had stepped over the line - Four drinks
• They actually show the headless corps - Four drinks
• Duncan lets another immie live - Two drinks
• Duncan uses something other than a sword to parry (i.e. wood, a pipe, a body part, etc.) - One drink
• A rock singer guest stars as an immie - Four drinks
• Suddenly, every single perp in Seacouver knows Kung Fu - One drink
• You remark on this fact, mumble something disparaging about David Still-Not-Asian Carradine, and are immediately chewed out by the nearest martial arts fanatic who swears HL only became interesting and worth watching with the episodes "The Zone" and "Revenge of the Sword" - Chug. Then find a Mac truck and run the bugger down. The cops will swear it's justifiable homicide, just tell 'em JLC sent you.
• Duncan takes after someone at a sprint - One drink
• Duncan takes his shirt off - Four drinks
• A native French speaker speaks perfect, unaccented English - Three drinks
• That native French speaker's voice is looped in by someone who speaks perfect, unaccented English - One drink
• The woman doing the looping just happens to be married to the series star - Two drinks (what, didn't you get a copy of the AOL Center Stage Chat?)
• Some one in Paris starts a conversation in English for no apparent reason save that subtitles would cost too much, and might be distracting - Two drinks
• Someone speaks English for no apparent reason except that the writers didn't want to have to use up act one explaining where a 2000 year old immortal from, say Egypt, who had been, say, out of it for most of the development of Western culture, would pick it up - Forget the booze, shake the babble fish out of your TV and ask *it* for answers 'cause I got *none*.
• Duncan uses the phone *while* he is also using the modem - Three drinks
• Someone immediately suggests a cellular modem, and you have a debate about four hundred immortal technophobes that ends up in a verbal brawl and you miss act three almost completely - Chug
• There are more than two immies in the same episode - One drink (this includes Duncan and Richie)
• There are more than two immies in the same scen - Two drinks
• There are more than three immies in the same episode - Three drinks
• There are more than three immies in the same scene - Four drinks
• Richie refers to Duncan as "Mac" - One drink
• Charlie finished two sentences in a row with the word "Man" - One drink
• Charlie and MacLeod spar - One drink
• Charlie actually gets MacLeod on the mat - Three drinks
• MacLeod whups Charlie's butt in front of all his students with a smile and a twinkle in his eye - Two drinks
• An episode guest stars a Forever Knight actor - One drink
• An episode is written by a Forever Knight writer - Two drinks
• Duncan dies - One drink
• Richie dies - Two drink (yes, this counts the first, highly important time)
• One or both bounces right back, and makes a trivial comment on how annoying being riddled with bullets/some other messy form of dying/etc. can be - Three drinks
• Amanda guest stars - One drink
• There is an episode without any of the principles save for Adrian - One drink
• There is an episode with Maurice - One drink
• Maurice is intoxicated - One drink
• Maurice is sober - Yeah, right!
• Horton guest stars - One drink
• Horton is shot/stabbed/generally supposedly killed - Two drinks
• The bastard stays dead - Go ahead and get plastered. You deserve it.
• Dawson swears he didn't know Horton was alive - Two drinks
• Dawson swears he didn't know Horton was alive, and this time he's not lying - Three drinks